WHACKOS IN THE NEWS - is back

Nothing Says 'I Love You' Like A Big Ol' Turd Nothing says "I love you" like a half-mile wide heart made out of manure. A southern Minnesota man created the Valentine's Day turd for his wife of 37 years. Bruce Andersland said he started the project with his tractor and manure spreader on Wednesday and finished 24 hours later. His wife, Beth, said it was the biggest and most original Valentine she has ever received.

TIRED OF WINTER YET?  A 25-year-old Ohio, man made the best of the bad economy and the massive amount of snow by making an extreme igloo.  Jimmy Grey -- who is unemployed -- built a four-room igloo with six-foot ceilings and an entertainment room. He's managed to hook up a TV by using extension cords that plug into outlets in his garage.  He holds nighttime get-togethers with friends and uses candles to light the snow fortress.

A 76-year-old British man had his right foot amputated, but was shocked when he later discovered doctors gave him a prosthetic left one in its place. Morrison noticed he was leaning to one side, but just assumed it was part of the process of getting used to his new foot. His wife is the one (BECAUSE WE MEN ARE OBLIVIOUS) that he had a second left kicker!  // NOW THEY SHOULD DO THE SAME WITH HIS HANDS ...

Granny Hunts Down, Carefully Identifies and Shoots in Groin Men who Raped her Granddaughter MELBOURNE, Australia -- Gun-toting granny Ava Estelle, 81, was so ticked-off when two thugs raped her 18-year-old granddaughter that she tracked the non-suspecting ex-cons down -- and shot their testicles off! The old woman spent a week tracking them down, shot them and them turned herself into the cops.  She told the police "Those bastards will never rape anybody again, by God." //  Rambo Granny told the media she did it because she knew the courts would go too easy on them.  //  Now, they can't figure out how to deal with Rambo Granny. "What she did was wrong, but you can't really throw an 81-year-old woman in prison." Det. Delp said, "especially when all 3 million people in the city want to nominate her for sainthood."

Jehovah's Witness Kenneth Hawthorn was doorknocking -- proselytizing -- in rural South Australia, when he called on a farm.  Ignoring the"Private -- Keep Out" sign, he pushed through a gate and was confronted by a 4-year-old ram by the name of "sh** for Brains".  He tried to defend himself using a briefcase full of Bibles but was knocked down, fracturing his leg.  Hawthorn sued the homeowners! ... HEY MORON!  DIDN'T YOU READ THE SIGN?  STAY AWAY FROM "**IT FOR BRAINS!!"  there is a reason they named him that ...

A judge in Montgomery County, Md., ruled in January that angrily pulling down one's pants and "mooning" a neighbor (even in front of the neighbor's 8-year-old daughter) is not illegal in the state - ALTHOUGH, IT MAY BE AN INVITATION TO AN ASS-KICKING.

Widespread news reports at first said a Blue Springs, Mo., woman had "swallowed" her cell phone after an argument with her boyfriend, but of course, miniaturization technology is not quite that advanced, and, several days later, Blue Springs police said it was not a swallowing but an attempted cramming (??????) and arrested the boyfriend.

Dozens Of Manhole Covers Stolen In Ind.   Thieves RECENTLY made off with dozens of hefty manhole covers and sewer grates ... leaving gaping holes scattered in streets across the city.  SCREW THE POTHOLES!  YIKES.
- copyright Rich Michaels Productions 2011