Thursday, April 7, 2011

Whackos in the News

Flying is already enough of a hassle without your boyfriend making it more stressful by cheating on you. Thirty-five-year-old Sarah Hannon recently woke up in the middle of a flight to find her boyfriend going at it with another woman onboard. They were on a flight heading from the Indian city of Bangalore to London.  When Hannon fell asleep after having a few cocktails, her 36-year-old boyfriend, Daniel Melia, began canoodling with another passenger, 29-year-old Clare Irby. Irby, who began doing some naughty things while she hid under a blanket, was ordered by flight attendants to stop, at which point Hannon woke up, discovered what was happening and started screaming. Police boarded the plane after it landed and arrested all three. Hannon was charged with being drunk on an aircraft, while Melia and Irby were charged with gross indecency.

A Pennsylvania man is hospitalized in fair condition after leading police on a high-speed chase and crashing his minivan seconds after climbing onto the roof while it was moving. Police in West Reading say the 38-year-old man didn't give up after the Friday night crash, but instead stripped naked and led cops on a foot chase along the road. When pepper spray and a Taser stun gun failed to stop the man, officers tackled him. 

PALO ALTO, Calif. - Palo Alto police are looking for a bank robber who favors a decidedly slow-speed getaway vehicle - an electric wheelchair. Police said a man in his 60s with gray hair and a beard held up the Wachovia Bank branch at the Stanford Shopping Center late this afternoon with a black handgun.  After the stickup, he left in his wheelchair and was last seen motoring down a nearby street toward El Camino Real, a major thoroughfare.

THERE'S ROAD RAGE, GROCERY CHECKOUT RAGE - AND NOW THERE'S TOILET RAGE.  AN INTOXICATED MAN IN INDIANA GOT PISSED AT THE TOILET IN A RESTAURANT - AND SHOT IT WITH HIS SEMI-AUTOMATIC HANDGUN.  HE TOLD COPS HE WAS ANGRY BECAUSE IT DIDN'T FLUSH FAST ENOUGH FOR HIM!

Brian Mills, 20, was charged with malicious destruction of property in December after he returned to a fast-food restaurant where he used to work and urinated into the deep-fat fryer.  (Local health officials said the risk to the public was minimal because the frying temperature is so high.)



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